How do you reinvent yourself? By now, you probably know what you like about yourself and what you don’t. When was the last time you had a significant and noticeable upgrade to those things you liked about yourself so that this version of “you” is something you will be happy with for a couple of years? Is it time to reinvent myself? That’s what I used to ask myself.
Moving from Tokyo to Connecticut, and back to Tokyo, and to Pennsylvania, and then to Tokyo, New York, Hong Kong and back to Connecticut again, I had plenty of chance to reinvent myself. The problem was that I kept reinventing the same exact “me.” Not even a slightly improved version of me. Just me.
According to Dr. Joe Dispenza, the author of “Breaking the Habit of Being Yourself”, you think what you feel most of the time. Your environment is the biggest influencer of what’s in your mind. You are cold, you are hot, you are hungry and you are all stressed out. Animals don’t dwell on the thoughts even after an attack by a tiger, but humans tend to think it over and over again. Pretty soon, you start to feel what you think rather than thinking what you feel (i.e. Have you felt sick on Monday morning?) When this cycle of thinking what you feel and feeling what you think becomes memorized in your body, you don’t even need to think consciously any more and the body begins to respond automatically. Dr. Joe Dispenza calls this state of being “Thinking equal to environment” and, when you are in this loop, nothing new can be created from it.
|The scientists have discovered that most of our decisions, actions, emotions and behavior depend upon the 95% of brain activity that is beyond our conscious awareness. Our body-mind is so highly capable of living our lives on auto-pilot that you don’t need to think consciously to do 95% of what you do every day. That’s pretty amazing. Sometimes you feel your life is becoming slightly repetitive and uneventful, but that’s because your body-mind is doing a good job.|
|Moreover, your subconscious mind, by design, is operating without checking with your conscious mind so you don’t even know why you are acting the way you are and feeling what you are feeling sometimes. If you are feeling blue today, it is very hard to get out of it by your conscious effort because your subconscious mind has already decided that it’s going to be a bad day independent of what you are thinking consciously. This is one of the reasons why it is so hard to change. The conscious mind may be in the present (for example, I want to lose weight.) but the subconscious body-mind is in the past, faithfully and automatically reconstructing the old “me” from the memorized emotions (Ice cream makes me happy!).|
I made a conscious decision to come to Vermont so that I can spend six months snowboarding. There is nothing here to automatically reconstruct “me” from the memorized experiences and there are no expectations of what I should be. I put myself in a survival mode so that whatever “me” I create is wholly a consequence of my conscious decisions. I was curious what kind of “me” I will create this time.
Did I succeed in reinventing a better version of “me” in Vermont? Is it a happier “me”? Well, I really don’t know if I am better or happier, but I think I am a truer me than when I was a Corporate “me” where I felt I was the only Zebra among Thoroughbreds.
|I just wanted to be “me” but I did not know who I was supposed to be, so I ended up with a bunch of well groomed Thoroughbreds. It was fun running at high speed with a group of fast horses, so I kept running faster and faster. Sometimes I ran faster than most of them on this side of the field, but no one wanted to bet on me on the race track. The thing was that I quietly enjoyed being the dark horse… with a stripe.|
By the way, why do I want to reinvent myself? It’s not perfect, but I kind of like “me” and it does not need a major overhaul. I carefully steer clear of over-expectations to avoid any disappointment and try to find many small happiness in my every day life. Why do I need to change what I have?
Because you are so much more capable of being better. Because you can be more than what you are today. So, why not try? You don’t need to wait till you have some traumatic experience to change your life. But if you are not quite ready to totally rebuild yourself from scratch, perhaps what you need is to “renew” yourself, not reinvent, so that you erase some of those memorized negative emotions and create more positive ones. Then, you look forward to what is to come in your life and be excited about what you are creating. I like when you talk so passionately about things you like.
Come to Ormsby Hill and renew some of your memorized emotions…
In pursuit of a better “me”…
|The Inn at Ormsby Hill
1842 Main Street
Manchester Center, VT 05255